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Dear Toby

created at: 01 10 10Dear Toby,

Life just isn’t the same without you.   It will never be the same.

It’s now been a year- a whole year-since we said goodbye. I think I have cried a million tears in that time.

I always knew my heart would break when you had to leave me but I really wasn’t prepared. My heart was shattered. I selfishly wanted to keep you forever because you made my world a much better place

Your leash still hangs on the back of the door the way it always did. I don’t think that I will ever take it down- nor do I want to- it is somehow a connection to you and a reminder of the endless hours of walks, fun and adventures we shared. So many wonderful memories and for that I am truly thankful.

Charlotte misses you too and still talks about you a lot. One night she left eight shoes outside her bedroom door - four for you and four for  Milly to “help you find your way back home because you must be lost.” Just recently, she told me that if she could make one wish, it would be to have you and Milly come back home again for dinner. At Christmas she was so sweet and left some treats out for Santa to take to you and Milly so that you guys wouldn’t miss out on Christmas Day-I really hope you got them ( and that you didn’t steal Milly’s). And, just so you know, we still sing the Toby Doodle song, but it’s just not the same without you barking the chorus.

I owe you so much and I can never repay you -you were always there for me, as  my protector and  my best friend. People who don’t understand our bond have never had the joy of experiencing something similar.  You made me so happy and taught me how to enjoy the simplest things in life like a walk to the park, a throw of a Frisbee or the ocean breeze (how you loved it). I really hope you look back at our fourteen years together and had a great time too- I am pretty sure you did.

Please know that you will never be forgotten and my heart will always ache to pat that gorgeous head of yours once again.   I love you.  Forever xx

 

  • Cimg0525_thumb
    Author katrina Member since Sep 17, 2010

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    • Jessie06
      Jessie06     Posted on Dec 30, 2014

      I have tears streaming down my fast Katrina as I read your blog. We all know our little furry or feathered frienda can't be with us forever BUT nothing prepares us for that moment when they leave us.
      I cried when Dr Harry lost Rosie too. We lost Jessie just over 2 weeks ago so our pain is still raw. We lost other pets over the years and everytime I think of them I shed a silent tear.
      I hope Jessie, Toby and all the fur babies are waiting for us at Rainbow Bridge so we can cross the bridge together to be never parted again! Sending you big hugs.

    • sharmee11
      sharmee11     Posted on Dec 05, 2012

      Dear Katrina, nothing can prepare you for the sudden loss our beloved pets. i was devastated when my beautiful 11yr old cat was tragiacally taken from us, i don't think my heart will ever mend like you it was shattered the day Sharmee died..   After hving her for 11yrs since she was 4 weeks old....... she was my heart and soul..it has just been over 1yr since she passed but it only seems like yesterday the grief is still very fresh........Debbie

    • emmag
      emmag     Posted on Aug 15, 2012

      i've been to the vet's every day now for 9 days and it is very evident that there are a lot of 'fur-kids'out there, incredibly important to their families. 

    • Joanne
      Joanne     Posted on May 21, 2011

      Dear Katrina, I have only just lost my gorgeous staffy Roxy a few weeks ago.  She was nearly 10 and became very ill very quickly and I had to make the heartbreaking decision to have her put to sleep on the same day as the vet visit.  All I wanted to do was to take her home with me for one more night and cuddle her the whole time. It is absolutely gut renching and  I have cried buckets of tears.  I never expected to lose her so quickly , I see her everywhere and I will miss her forever.  I love your website as I feel better knowing other people also understand the pain of losing something so dear to your heart.  

      JOANNE x

    • codefire
      codefire     Posted on May 09, 2011

      Katrina,

      I too lost my best mate (Brodie) two years ago. Not a day goes by that I don't think of him. I didn't think I would ever be ready to get another dog. I too keep his lease hanging on the door. It was only recently when I found a little stray dog, that we have now adopted from the local RSPCA, that I have realised that, while I will never be able to replace Brodie, our new addition is a new chapter and adventure in our lives. We love our new little friend. His cheecky nature keeps us entertained for hours. I am glad he has entered our lives. 

    • Stuart
      Stuart     Posted on Feb 17, 2011

      Dear Katrina,

      Toby was a beautiful dog. Being able to work with him must have meant spending many quality hours together and I'm sure he was more a fur-kid than a dog. As a whole I think society grossly underestimates how intelligent our animals are and what they know. Anyone who is an 'it's just a dog' person is bad news. That's what makes our dogs so special, they are in so many ways better than people.

      Reading your words about Toby I'm sure has helped others, myself included, to know that someone else feels the same about their lost companions. 

      I haven't been able to bring myself to 'replace' Clyde yet though. I guess I will eventually, part of me says I don't want to have another dead fur-kid to deal with in the future. But I guess I will do it.

      Regards

      Stuart

    • jodes
      jodes     Posted on Feb 12, 2011

      Deat katrina, My heart still is aching 16mths on after Herbert passed away... But now l can think of him, close my eyes, hear him, see him, smell him - and l smile.

      Now when l go to the beach, l smile...  I love him.. as you love Toby.. always. xx

    • katrina
      katrina     Posted on Jan 29, 2011

      Thanks so much guys. I really do wonder why we back up and get pets again when it always  ends in heartache but I guess the tears are worth it for all the love and joy.

      I really do hope we see them again one day

      xx

    • tan1976
      tan1976     Posted on Jan 29, 2011

      Dear Katrina,

      I read your tribute with tears pouring down my eyes. I loved watching Toby on Dr Harry and Milly was just so adorable. They felt like apart of my family. I was very upset when i heard of their passing. i lost my gorgeous girl a cat Kimba in 2009 at 17 1/2yrs old and last November i lost my gorgeous Maine Coon, Smokey very sudden and unexpected at the age of 10 yrs. im still very devestated and my other cat is still mourning his loss. We get our Cavalier King Charles Spaniel on Friday to brighten our house hold up, but by no means will we ever forget our gorgeous pets in heaven. I sometimes wonder why we get pets when at their ending it causes so much heart ache, but just like humans, the memories, joy and contentment they bring to our lives way out weighs the ending. Our thoughts are with you at this very sad time. Tanya xxxxx

    • debbie
      debbie     Posted on Jan 21, 2011

      Dear Katrina

      I can understand how your heart is still broken. I think losing our beautiful furry friends is one of the hardest things we go through in our life - they give us such joy, companionship and most of all, unconditional love.  Like you, I would have done anything to be able to have my Kirby stay with me forever...but I do believe we will see them again.

      My thoughts are with you at this really sad time.

      Take care

      Debbie

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