Too young To go
|09 sept 13 - 21 jan 15|
Hiding under the neighbours house, sleeping under his favourite bush
We got Legs from a local pet shop. He got my attention by smooching up to the glass & then licking it. We brought him home but within a week him & his brother, who look very much alike, had to go to the vets for diarrhoea. Poor little darlings not the best start. Over time he grew to be a beautiful sleek cat who was independent & would come back home when he heard the treat bag shaking - well most times.
He liked to play with his brother in the cat garden area, liked his chin rubs, liked his tin tuna & occasionally liked to sit on my lap for a belly rub.
Sadly just before Xmas 14 I noticed a few changes in him, but it was when I found him eating kitty litter that I got concerned. The vet said Legsy's kidneys were enlarged. After many test & procedures it was identified my little boy had lymphona. How could this be? He was only 15 months old!
I took him to a specialist & a week later Legsy started chemo. After 4 days things started to decline. He hardly ate, slept a lot, hardly showed any interest. I put this down to the first session of chemo which (after looking on the Internet) is usually bad. Second session & my boy stopped eating & you could see he was not in a good place. The nausea tablets did little to ease him. A few days later I made the choice to get him a feeding tube because if he didn't eat then he would starve before he could fight the disease. Unfortunately thiis simple procedure was the final straw for his weakened body.
I came home to feed him but it was evident he was not in a good physical or mental place. I watched him for about an hour through tears begging him to give me a sign, to let me know if this was it or was it just another side effect. Then I phoned the vet to arrange to put him to sleep. It was so hard to make the call, harder still to take him there.
On arriving the vet looked at him & said it was obvious he wasn't happy & she asked me if I was sure. I said I didn't know because I had no idea if this was normal for a cat on chemo. She asked if I would like her to phone the specialist to find out & I said yes. How could I Not?
On her return I could take him to the specialist to run more tests or get alternative treatment to see him out. I looked at him & knew he'd had enough.
I stayed in the room & I believe he may have even given up before the drug was administered. My little boy was gone & no amount of praying in the previous month or at that moment to God or St Francis had got me a miracle.
i don't want this to be all about his suffering, that was only a short part of his short life, & there were a lot of happy moments & memories made, but those are mine to keep.
My ending his suffering is now the start of mine but I wanted to tell his story because he gave his all to a horrible disease & maybe someone reading this may take more notice of their pet & see the signs. It only took a week & a half for Legsy to go from a basically normal cat to the stage I had to put him to sleep. Lymphona is not just an old cats disease, but also get as much information as you can about different treatments. Cats are supposed to handle chemo pretty well but my little man was one of a small percentage who didn't & now the saying 'killed by kindness' has a whole new meaning for me.
Be in peace.